38 Good (and Funny) Reasons to Attend College Online

Stinky RoommateNo smelly roommates. Anyone who ever had the pleasure of sharing a dorm room with a stranger knows that the chances of getting a smelly person are at least 32%.

You don’t have to pay for parking. Parking on a college campus will either cost you and arm and leg to secure a parking pass, or, if you go commando on it, will cost you hundreds of dollars ($) in parking fines.

No group projects. Working in a group sucks. It sucks your time, your patience, and your desire to live.

Cook for yourself.
Save money and eat a sandwich from your fridge. Or finish your schoolwork early and go out for dinner. It sure beats the stuff in dining halls.

Avoid B.S. ‘fees’.
Enrolling as a full-time student at a university generally requires you to drop money on things like “Recreational fees” and “Technology fees” to cover the costs of campus amenities.

Set your own schedule. This is one of the biggest reasons people use distance/online degree programs, but it’s hard to deny the benefits of having a flexible schedule.

It’s the same material. You learn from the same book, do the same lessons and take the same tests.

Everything is online these days.
Even traditional classes require a great deal of online participation through e-mail, online lesson submission, discussion boards, etc. You’re halfway to taking the class online already.

Save money. Credits earned through distance/online degree programs often are cheaper than on-campus credit hours.

Shower sandals.
For those of you thinking about the dorm life, a lot of schools still have dorms with communal bathrooms and showers.

BeerThe beer flows like wine. A great deal of college students end up partying too much and set themselves back from the get go. Being away from the campus bars can help keep you on track.

Avoid the ‘Freshman 15′.
You may not be walking to class, but you won’t be wasting time sitting in your dorm, eating bad food, drinking too much, and generally being lazy. Schedule your online coursework around a regular exercise routine.

Stay in your town.
You don’t have to relocate to get a degree online. In fact, you don’t even need to leave your couch.

No cancelled classes.
Teacher unexpectedly can’t make it to class today? In a traditional classroom, you could waste an hour getting yourself to school to sit and wait for a teacher that doesn’t show up. It would’ve been great when you were 10, but you have stuff to do.

No scheduled exams.
Take your tests when you are completely ready, which will lead to . . .

Higher grades.
As long as you stay consistent in your work ethic, getting A’s and B’s on an online course is easier than in a traditional class for nothing more than you don’t have to take a test until you feel comfortable with the material.
Alarm
Be unique, not student 110 of 230.
Large lecture halls full of students give you little opportunity to get 1 on 1 help and to not feel like a cattle in a herd. Online degree programs offer help through resource centers, online class management panels, and direct emails with teachers and other students concurrently enrolled.

You don’t feel comfortable heading to class with 18 to 22 year olds. A lot of online students are professionals or other adults looking to return to school to further their educations. Perhaps the backwards baseball cap and shacker outfit toting crowd isn’t your thing. Work on your degree from home and stay in your comfort zone.

No speaking in front of the class. Most people dread public speaking, even to the point that they don’t like to be thrust in front of a classroom on the spot.

No worries about a class filling up. Every semester there was always that individual that was worried about the 10:00 am finance class filling up and having to take the 8:00 am class. Online you don’t have to worry about that.

No 8:00 am classes. Speaking of class time, you won’t have to worry about waking up ridiculously early for any class if you’re completing them online.

Never dealing with the guy in front.
In every class I took I always had to deal with the idiot in the front that asked the dumbest questions to seem smart. Online you don’t have to worry about this idiot.

Egotistical professors. College professors believe that they own the world and are the smartest people alive. When in reality if they were so smart why aren’t they in the real world applying what they teach their students. Maybe this only applies to business majors.

Night owl roommate. So you like to sleep at night, who doesn’t? When you study online you don’t have to worry about the roommate that does his “best” work at 2 am.

Nap on a bed, not a desk. Everyone has to take naps, and in a classroom you’ll have to take them in an uncomfortable position with the noise of a teacher speaking. Why not curl up in your own bed instead?

Clubs, organizations, cliques. While some people go to college solely to join a Greek organization or build their resumes up by joining every club on campus, that’s not for everyone. You’ll never have to know these things exist when you’re submitting lessons from home or the coffee shop.

The campus “preacher”. College campuses are hotbeds for public demonstrations, and it seems like every one has a religious zealout shouting from the middle of campus at passer by about how to live their lives. Humor for some, serious business for others - mostly you want to avoid it right?

Getting hit by a car/bus/moped/bike. Being a pedestrian on a college campus can be dangerous.

Free Laundry BiaFree laundry.
This is assuming you have a washer and dryer where you currently live, which most do. Living on campus will most assuredly require you to collect quarters to clean your socks. That’s living!

Community/Resident Advisors. For those that would be incoming freshmen, take a moment and understand that there are some huge nerds that are actually employed by the university to live on your floor, make bulletin boards, and bother you. Typically they are ex-high school band members and “get loose” by watching movies with other CA’s/RA’s and eating chocolate. Do you want these people invading your space, let alone living near you? No.

** Sidenote: Unfortunately, they aren’t all like Crawl.

Sleep through a class. When your classes can occur at the time you see fit why worry about the time. No worries about missing a class ever.

Privacy? When you are stuck in the tiniest of rooms with one other person there leaves little time for privacy. I hope you like your new roommate.

Lectures are boring. When you study online you don’t have to listen to another boring lecture. Chances are you would sleep through it in class anyway.

Quiet Hours.
Sometimes you just like to play your music or watch your tv at a certain volume. Well there could be problems if this interferes with someone’s studying.

Rainy days and snow storms. Walking to and from class in the rain or snow can be a pain in the butt. Of course, so can the bitter cold.

Socializing with idiots. Whether it is idiots in your dorm, the classroom, or just passing you don’t have to even look at these people when you take classes online.

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